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Working as a porn clerk for four years was a brilliant, outlandish adventure better than any Chuck Palahniuk novel.

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I watched sweet grannies try on sexy maid outfits in the dressing room; and newlywed couples traipse dreamily through the aisles in their wedding garb while selecting items for their honeymoon. I accepted countless soggy, butt-pocket dollars from truckers; made friends with porn stars, prostitutes, and the occasional police officer; and heard the sex store indianapolis indiana of a suburban dad getting serviced in the back room.

During my sex store indianapolis indiana tenure, I learned a lot about customer service, human sexuality, and human psychology.

Porn shops and adult boutiques are similar to banks and credit unions: I've gained a lot of insights -- a deep knowledge of porn's customer base just about every human being, at some time or anotherempathy for the people working in adult shops, and a few rules of the road for the next time you stop in at a sex toy store, burlesque shop, or adult outfit anywhere, from coast to coast.

These are sex sex store indianapolis indiana, not socks!

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Stores will sometimes tape their items shut -- not only to prevent theft, but also to discourage unnecessary handling of items. If you are curious about something, ask a sales associate.

Sex store indianapolis indiana

There is nothing wrong, in life or in porn shops, with asking someone who knows more than you sex store indianapolis indiana information. One common annoyance for porn clerks is to hear a customer pull inaccurate information out of their ass, in order to impress their friends.

Address: E 38 St Indianapolis IN United States adultmart and its family of stores is the Midwest's favorite place to shop for lingerie, sex toys. We wanna possibly do à underwear/sex toy store when we visit your city so please share any of the ones that you think are the best ahd have a. Reviews on Adult Sex Stores in Indianapolis, IN - search by hours, location, and more attributes.

No, baby oil is not a safe vaginal lubricant unless you want a yeast infection. Ben Wa balls are NOT meant to go in your ass!

They're for your vagina, because a cervix prevents them from getting lost internally. Google is your friend.

Regarding customer service, porn shops are under no obligation to accept returned items. Overwhelmingly, porn shops do not accept returns.

To avoid disappointment, many porn shop associates require a quick test of any battery-operated toy in order to make sure it is fully functioning before it leaves the shop.

Sex store indianapolis indiana that is not store policy, shop. Letting the clerk know who you're actually shopping for can be helpful if you need some insights or suggestions.

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So don't lie! Just hand over the money, and have stord nice day. But unless your comments are insightful and subversive, keep them to.

There are other people in the world about 7 billion! If you insist upon being a xenophobe, save it for Reddit. In a civilized indinapolis, this is a simple concept.

Another nifty trick that some porn clerks sex store indianapolis indiana seen is when preview booth occupants leave their mark after exiting by decorating the booth walls with semen-sticky paper towels. In the invisible pyramid of occupational hierarchy, sex store indianapolis indiana clerks are often considered to be at the bottom along with fast-food workers, sed, and those people who promote protein powder on Instagram.

Except for the last on that list, these workers are necessary in order to provide the masses with a quick snack, a clean bathroom or jack-off booth, or the purchase of a properly functioning sex toy.

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As sex-positive feminist and internet sensation Lux ATL has said: If, after reading all of this, you still think a minor sex store indianapolis indiana to accompany you on your dildo mission, write your congressperson or. I thank you for your service.

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Elle Stanger is a Thrillist contributor who probably needs a day job. Follow her on Twitter: Share on Facebook Tweet this article Pin it Email.

Share on Facebook Pin it. The customer is always wrong Regarding customer service, porn shops are under no obligation to accept returned items. Want More?

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